When change was the order of the day

This is how I saw Bangalore after 5 years of living in that gem of a town called Mangalore.

Bannerghatta Road : Could not recognize it. Right at the entrance was the new Infosys Pride apartments (which was then changed to just Pride Apartments after Infy made a fuss. I have no idea why it was called Infosys Pride in the first place)

Jayanagar Fourth Block : This was total let down. Traffic, hordes of people everywhere.The old Pavitra hotel was torn down. There was hectic work going on for renovation, but all the charm was lost. Cool Joint was doing brisk business as usual. Adigas was getting a foothold into the big league, moving on from the tiny darshini that it orginally satrted as.

Kanakapura Junction : Wow, this was something. When i'd left Bangalore, the ring road ended here. We'd heard about something being in the pipeline about extending the road. When I was back, the road had extended all the way upto Mysore road, eliminating the need for people in South Bangalore to circle round the city, and going via KR Market to get there.

The Weather : absolutely rocked. Mangalore has horrible weather, throughout the year, and coming to Bangalore to see the Mercury dip to 7- degrees in the night was like stepping into a refrigerator. Not to mention driving a dilapidated bike in the early morning fog that reduced visibility to bare meters.

The Food : Getting decent idli sambar in Magalore was a pain. So was getting good Masala Dosa. But out here in Bengloor, that's the least of your problems. Just pop in to any one of the Darshini's and all your idli dosa dreams come true. I recommend however, SLV Ragigudda for Idli sambar and Dosa Camp, Jayanagar for Dosas of any kind. And if you have time and patience, Vidyarthi Bhavan in Gandhi Bazaarserves the most amazing Masala Dosa. (When i'd been to VB once, i found a glass that had the follwing words inscribed on it : "Stolen from Vidyarthi Bhavan"...Nice way of shaming people into not stealing their tumblers)

BMTC Buses : When i'd left, they were red monsters, and called BTS. When I was back, they were a more pleasant blue and cream, and called BMTC. The level of service had also improved, and by then, BMTC was the only public transport service in Asia to be making a profit.

A lot more things exist, but they do not come to mind right now. Watch this space for more updates.

Oldboy - A review - * * * * *

I bought this movie solely because I had heard that Zinda was a remake of it. Though I was pretty disappointed with Zinda, the thought of watching a Korean movie for the first time, together with the fact that the DVD cost only 75 bucks made me reach out to my wallet. And (old)boy, was it a good investment!

If you've seen Zinda, and you thought the movie has an edgy and queer feel to it, then Oldboy will leave you astounded. The movie starts with the main protagonist of the movie, Oh-Dae-Su (apparently, thats the way Koreans like to name themselves. Further on, In this review you will notice that I do not use any other names of characters, purely because the names are too wierd for me to remember) being kidnapped, and locked away. Why? He doesn't know. Where? He doesn't know. Who did this? He doesn't know. He keeps waiting for his release, which never comes. His whole life revolves round the television, which is his teacher, guide, friend, philosopher, lover. Then one day, 15 years later, he's set free. And he's told to find out why this was done to him. In 5 days......

There, thats the crux of the story. Zinda was about a school prank gone wrong and a guy avenging the outcome. Oldboy, though with the same plot outline, is about incest. Please do not watch it if your sensibilities are fragile, because if so, then you are bound to be scandalized by the movie. If you thought Zinda was violent and gory, Oldboy is a frickin blood bank. Some ofthe stuff includes Oh dae Su eating a live octopus, stuffing it into his mouth and chewing on it (Poor Guy, you gotta forgive him for that, coz for 15 years he's had nothing but wontons), gouging out teeth usng a hammer (shamelessly copied in Zinda), slitting throats with a broken tothbrush etc, cutting off one's tongue with a scissor... I hope you get the picture.Zinda had the milleniums worst ending, lame duck to the extreme. Oldboy will leave you stunned.

After the movie, I was left amazed by the deft screenplay, the cinematography and overall, the bravado of the director in bringing such a (potentially)controversial movie to light.

Finally, I'd like to thank Sanjay Gupta for being the plagarist that he is, beacuse if he'd not done what he's best at i.e. plagarise, then i'd have never heard about Oldboy. But Mr. Gupta, you goofed up this time. Zinda is a shame compared to Oldboy.

Addendum : This ones from Rediff.
"Sanjay Gupta call Zinda his tribute to every Korean movie he's seen. It's pretty obvious that he's seen only Oldboy"

Whats it about...

... one time bloggers????

Most of these blogs carry just one single post, which invariably go like this :

Hiiiiiiiiii, (wonder whom they're saying this to)
Myself Blahmaster Dipshit. This is my first blog :)
Notice the smiley...and no dude, I had no idea this was your first post, forget a blog..Youre a regular Salman Rushdie. This sentence is generally followed a full blown photograph in front of a computer, with a shitty grin plastered across the face.

My hobbies include collecting newspaper clippings of big busted Malayalam heroines and listening to hindi filmy music. I wish to expose myself to the world and to do friendship with pretty women.
Yup, you're at the right place son. That's what the blogsphere's there for
Hope to catch you soon. Byeeeeeee.
Love,
Blahmaster Dipshit

PS : I want to make the world a better place with my writings of love

AAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGGGHHH ...... MAKE WAY... PUKE

Life goes on.....

They were both young and madly in love...With each other that is. But both of them were too egotistic to admit it first, always dropping hints for the other to take the first step. The one that never came...........

Education made them drift apart. Distance was no deterrent for them, or so they thought. Though they tried to remain in touch, the absence and lack of communication spelt the death knell for whatever they shared or hoped to share.

He moved on, fell in love with someone else and was happy. He had not much contact with his first love. The one day, through a third channel, he got some news about her. Apparently, she had also moved on since then. She too was in love.

Time stopped. Nothing mattered anymore. The memories came flooding back. He shed a quiet tear, about what could have been. Then he smiled, wished her all the best in his heart and hoped that she would remain happy forever. He realised he himself had nothing to regret. And life still goes on for him. Last seen, he had a grin on his face when typing this.

Who on Earth.....

.....changed my template?????

Baby Steps in the right direction

We now have a logo....



....how much longer before we have the real deal??

Photograph sourced from Deccan Herald.

Enduring the times, becoming immortal

There are few radio/ televison jingles/ads that have lived through the times. This one's one of my favorites :


Nirma, Nirma, Nirma Detergent Tikiya
Iske jhaaaaaaaaag ne jadooooo kar diya
Paani me rehke bhi yeh kam gale
Dhero Kapde dhoye aur zyaada chale
Nirma, Nirma, Nirma Detergent Tikiya
Nirma

Also the Nirma Super ad, with Deepikaji (D) and the shopkeeper (SK) :

SK : Oho, Deepika ji, aaiyiye, aaiyiye. Yeh leejiye, aapka sab samaan taiyyar hai.
D : Yeh nahi, woh, Nirma Super neeli detergent tikiya
SK : Magar aap to woh hamesha mehengi waali tikiyaaaa.....?
D : Leti thi, magar wahi mehingi daamo wali quality, wahi safedi, wahi jhaag, jab kam daam me mile, to koyi woh kyon le, aur na le??
SK : Oho, maan gaye!
D : Kisko?
SK : Aapki baat ki nazar, aur Nirma Super, dono ko!

Voice over : Nirma Super, dhulaayi ka super dum, daam phir bhi kum!

I head from a friend that when he went to a party, the DJ actually played a remix which had "Washing Powder Nirma" thrown in at regular intervals, and it was the biggest hit of the evening! Long live Nirma! Nirmaa!!

Never Before, Never Again....

I am not old enough to comment on this with authority, but few will disagree with me if I claim that this was the greatest ODI ever played. Imagine creating a world record before lunch, only to see it being consumed for dinner. Whew! I had goose pimples and my hair was standing on it's end. I was Mr Bean after an electric shock. That was the efect the game had on me.

Whoever said cricket is losing it's charm and is very one-sided, well, boss, think again! Because yesterday, Australia and South Africa played each other in a way that reminded people for the umpteenth time that cricket is a game of glorious uncertainity. I cannot stop commenting to all the people I meet about how lucky I was to watch the match.

Being a Sunday, I was out loafing around as usual, so I was unlucky to miss the first Innings when Australia massacared the South African bowling to post a mammoth 434 runs. Whew! (I'm beginning to use this word too often...but I just can't seem to think of anything else). Captain extraordinary Ricky Ponting led the way with a spectacular assault on the beleaguered SA bowlers, already struggling without Pollock.

Then the chase began. At the loss of the first wicket, Ponting must have started practicing his victory speech. But then, who on earth new that a bald guy who goes by the name Herschelle Gibbs had different ideas? Together with his captain, the ever non-flappable Graeme Smith, he went around smashing the Aussie bowlers all around the park. Ater the pair got out, it was pretty dicey, because SA, though on course, never has the luxury of losing a wicket and still continue to be on track, because the total they were aiming to bring down was so intimidating! But such situations, which generally crush the weaker willed players, also bring out the heroes in some. And this clarion call was answered by a imunitive little fella, whome people call Mark Boucher. Cool, Calm and Collected, Boucher held fort at one end, regularly smacking the boundaries while at the other end partners came and went, but not before making invaluable contributions themselves. All in all, it boiled down to the last over, when there were 7 runs reuired, and 2 wickets in hand. With one of the fasted bowlers in the world bowling this over, things could go either way.

Ball 1 : Lee to Boucher - Single. Boucher slams it back down the pitch. Lee stops the ball bravely, with his foot. One run.

Ball 2 : Lee to Hall - Four!!! Pulled over mid wicket, over the in field.

Ball 3 : Lee to Hall - Out!! Tries to repeat the shot, but hits it straing the Mid On

Ball 4 : Lee to Ntini - Single. Ntini runs it down to third man. after this the fielders converge into the 30 yard circle to stop the single.

Ball 5 : Lee to Boucher - Four!!! Slammed over mid -on ...... The greatest ever ODI brought to an end....No one was more deserving of scoring the final runs than Boucher

There were tears in my eyes.....

Images:



















All pictures sourced from BBC and Deccan Herald.

A little risque, but harmless and enjoyable nevertheless

Please proceed only if you have devilish sense of humor, and don't take offence to risque jokes.

There was a post on Spoonerisms by my friend and fellow blogger Vijay Krishna. Though his area of interest remained primarily in English ones, it got me thinking about the ones we have in Konkani. Of course, it's used by all young Konkani males (not the women though, never really understood why..any ideas???) deliberately, unlike how a spoonerism is generally used (involutarily, by mistake). Here are a few, with translations :

Spoonerism : Sooth Moanu Ettha (I'll break a thread and return)
Actual : Mooth Sonu Ettha (I'll pee and be back)

Spoonerism : Chetti Tonda Gopi (Gopi, with a flat face)
Actual : Gotto Tonda Chepi (Stuff your b***s in your mouth)

Spoonerism : Ganga Masterni (Ganga Teacher)
Actual : Mango Gasterni (Didn't wash your wee wee)

Spoonerism : Mira Kini (This is just a name)
Actual : Keera Minni (A parrots wee wee)

Here's a long one...

Spoonerism : Gayyele Baal Apponukka, Sing Maaratha (Dont touch a cows tail, it might attack you with it's horns)
Actual : Baylel Gall Apponukka, Mango Shiratha (Dont touch your wife's face, your wee wee may shrink)

And my personal favorite :

Spoonerism : Master Kini (fairly straightforward, take the english meaning)
Actual : Kasteri Minni (your little wee wee on your undies)

Who do you think won?

The competition was to eat the worlds largest burger. The conditions :

"The requirements were absurdly outrageous: to eat 11 pounds of burger in under three hours, you’d have to be crazy, with an iron stomach and a mouth to match."

So now, who do you think won the competition?

This guy here ?



or is it...



Get more about the story here.

Meanwhile, the last I heard, kids in some parts of the world were still going without two square meals a day.

Wham, Bam, Thank You...

Scene 1
Venue : Paris ,some boulevard with an unpronouncable name.

Here I am in this tour bus, with colleagues touring the city of Paris. Our bus driver, an uptight German, wants to reverse. He does. Rather he tries to, but the big Crruuunchhh deters him from trying anything else. When we come out and investigate, he's whacked a car, which was parked alonside the kerb, with the owner nowhere in sight. Read on to find out what happened next and be amazed:
- We wait for the owner of the car in question to arrive.
- When he does, the driver and the owner speak something.
- By what I make out, they've agreed that the car guy has insurance, so it's not a problem.
- They exchange business cards, and we're on our way.

Scene 2
Venue : Hudson Circle , Bangalore
There's an auto (what else?) and a Tempo Goods carrier. Both of them coming towards Hudson Circle from Nrupathunga Road. (Now anyone who's made this turn will agree with me that it's one of the most dangerous stretches in Bangalore. Everyone freely cuts lanes and for those fleeting moments, you're not really sure if you'll get out alive)
Auto Guy wants to go to Corporation Circle, Tempo Guy to Kasturba Road. Both of then on wrong lanes, both decide to cut lanes at the same fateful moment. CRASH. Both drivers get out. Fisctcuffs ensue. Jam all over the place. No cops in sight.

Welcome to Bangalore

COALITION AGAINST CORRUPTION

I claim no originality in this post. This is done purely to raise awareness about the Coalition against Corruption.

I also request other bloggers from bangalore to take note of this organization, and raise awareness among the people. Bribery is the scourge of this country, and must be combated against. This is a step in the right direction

Objectives of CAC

CAC is a campaign involving citizens to fight against corruption in government departments and agencies. Under the aegis of Public Affairs Centre, (PAC), five dedicated non-profit organizations in Bangalore have come together to establish a HELPLINE which would provide assistance to citizens in the redressal of their complaints and grievances relating to corruption faced from public departments and agencies. CAC will address corruption in public utilities and departments by bringing social and moral pressure on the impugned agencies (and corrupt officials) through an established citizen-friendly process.

Modality of Functioning

- The affected citizens may register their complaints with CAC by filling up a brief factual statement, or online, or by telephone. In the latter cases, the complainants will be required to follow up with written complaints, in order to authenticate their identity.

- CAC will forward the complaints to the appointed nodal officers in the departments and agencies concerned for taking remedial action. These should be based on actual demands for illegal gratifications, or where their requests for services are unduly delayed or denied, with the apparent motive to canvass illegal gratifications.

- CAC will follow up the complaints in case responses are unavailable for a reasonable time, or are not satisfactory, by phone calls or meeting the nodal officers / higher authorities in the departments and agencies concerned, as required. The complainants will be informed of the progress of their cases appropriately.

-CAC will give publicity through media to the complaints received and action taken.

CAC’s Effectiveness

Undoubtedly, the success of CAC will depend on the effective participation of willing and alert citizens. Transparency International (India) has listed Karnataka as one of the most corrupt states in the country. It is essential to reverse this trend through determined efforts and people participation. It is envisaged that:

- The social and moral pressure built up by CAC will act as a deterrent against corruption. CAC will enlist the support of the media and eminent citizens for the campaign against corruption.

- CAC will educate the public through awareness campaigns to stand against corruption. CAC will resort to the provisions of the Right to Information Act (RTI), where appropriate.

- The databank and data analyses to be undertaken by CAC will be disseminated to the government agencies, Lok Ayukta, and to the public.

Departments and Agencies covered

To start with, CAC will cover the following nine departments and agencies located in Bangalore.

Bangalore Mahanagar Palike (BMP);
Bangalore Development Authority (BDA);
Bangalore Water Supply and Sewerage Board (BWSSB);
Bangalore City Police (BCP);
Bangalore Electricity Supply Company (BESCOM);
Transport Department;
Revenue Department;
Stamps & Registration Department and
Department of Health (Hospitals).

In addition, CAC will also address specific instances of corruption, reported by affected citizens, in other departments and agencies, on a case-by-case basis.

Future Programmes

CAC will start with one centre located at the office of the PAC, at No.422, VI Block, 80 Feet Road, Koramangala. Additional centres will be opened in the subsequent phases at different localities in Bangalore.

For additional information on CAC, and to register your complaints and grievances, please contact:

Dedicated Helpline Number:4110 5161
Timings: 2:30 P.M. to 5:00 P.M.(Monday to Friday)
Coalition Against Corruption (CAC) Centre,
C/O Public Affairs Centre,No.422, VI Block, 80 Feet Road, Koramangala, Bangalore, 560095.
PAC Tel. Numbers:25537260/25520246/25525452/25525453
Email to: cacblr@gmail.com Website: www.pacindia.org

It's just another day, for you and me, In Paradise

When in rains, it pours. Well, it wasn' t the case so far, here in Bangalore, unlike good ole Kudla, which makes the Bangalore rains look like a sorry excuse. But it seems like the big guy handling things up there is making up for lost time.

It rained. No, it poured last night. Lightning, Thunder, the works. And do I need to elaborate about the condition of the roads now? My thought that it was an incredible effort by the authorities to get the worst road in Bangalore back to a motorable condition, which, by the way, has now turned into a muckpool, is now replaced with a wry "I-wasn't-hoping-this-would-happen-but-it-did" smile.

Apart from the widespread destruction of roads that the rains cause (Mind you, I am not blaming the rain, let me make it very clear...If anything, I love the rains), another thing they do is bring down the temperatures big time. You can notice the difference early in the morning, when the air is crisp and everything looks clean and scrubbed. Thats exactly how the Bangalore of yore used to be. But, paradise is never the same, is it? Paradise lost will never be regained. *sigh*

Now, our esteemed CM, HDK, as the newspapers lovingly call him, has gone ahead and done a Deve Gowda, saying that his government will not cower to the "threats" of the IT/BT industries. It seems that this section of the working class public is being rowdy, by highlighting their problems, whilst ignoring the woes of other people. Yes, HDK saar, bad roads, poor electricity supply, lack of water, increasing traffic woes due to effective mismanagement by our traffic cops...all this affects only the IT/BT guys. The other people are totally insulated from all this. In fact, they enjoy it. Is that what you want to beleive? I was just beginning to get over my cynical view of you getting into the seat of power via your fathers drama, after listening to all your idealistic views. But then, you went ahead and proved that all of it was just horseshit.

The Holy Cow has lost all faith in politicos.

The things people do, I say...

It's sad that I have fallen to such levels, trying to increase the hits on my blog. But thanks for coming anyways. (Apy, Dev...You have company in the pits)

A lot of things aboutIndia ..... just so you dont feel cheated

To all those who are not a party of Canara2k, dont worry, it's just an Internal joke. If you wanna learnn more about it, click here.

The Holy Cow is not the Master of all he surveys

Is there anything at all that i do well? Err....This is something that I have thought about, quite a bit, since yesterday evening. And sadly, I have failed to come up with a satisfactory answer. (Well, the answer is no, which is a definite answer, but not satisfactory for me)

I guess I can blame this on my mentality of beginning something in the right earnest, and then totally losing interest in whatever it is. From what I hear from my parents, relatives, neighbor aunties and uncles and other assorted fuddy-duddies, it's the drawback of our generation. We are a bunch of confused, lazy people, who expect things to come too easy. I dont know if that's true, but that's what they think.

Coming back to more important topics (i.e. Myself...Narcissism is something I'm really good at), I just realised I am one of those "Jack of all trades, but a master of none". Lets start right from school. Studies were something that I never took seriously, but always managed to pass my exams. Of course, it took a lot of hard work at the end, but it was worth it, considering the fun i'd have on regular days, bumming around. So this meant I never learnt much at school. Whatever I learnt (If you can call it that) was promptly forgotten the next day. Sports was a strong point, or so I thought. Never came first or second in anything. But then I salvaged some pride (In my own eyes) by telling myself that it was competing that mattered, not winning (Yeah, Right!). (Wait......I remember coming 1st in some relay in college...If the other 3 guys wanna take credit...Piss off...I need this, my morale is dented right now). Cricket was a passion. I considered myself an all-rounder, and did pretty well, when we played friendly matches regularly. But when I played for school, I had scores of 0 and 1 in two matches to show for my all round prowess.

Fast Forward to college. This was where I shone brightest wrt my half baked skills. Computer Programming was so-so. Only here and there could I come up with brilliant code workarounds (All of them, memorably, came in my final year project). Sp0ort went for a toss, as I kept growing fatter and lazier. Maybe table tennis once in a while. Cricket was a shame, as I led my class team to spectaular defeats in the college tourneys. (But again, in the friendlies, I shone).

Coming to the present, I would rate myself as a pretty competent space monkey, but a total ass of a programmer. It still takes me almost an hour more than normal people to grasp a concept, to think of supernova level ideas. I can blah blah on but i'll give it a stop. I guess everyone can draw a fair picture of how I am.

All of this is OK for me. I can live and get by with it. This is because I think that I am the unparalleled master of the universe when it comes to getting an idea across, or when it comes to speaking my mind. This has held me in good stead (Mind you, i beep out the f***s when i speak to people higher up on the food chain...always helps).

The holy Cow shall moo on. Long live the cow!

Hey...wait a mo...ficky fick....ain't the cow feminine!!! Well, whatever, who gives a shit

Breakin Free

It's been quite some days since I last composed a Blog. Well, that's because neither has there been anything happening in my life to gimme any sort of Inspiration to blog, nor do I have the time to take stock of hapenings around me so as to write about them. Frankly, I'm bored. I yearn for a change. The routine has gotten to me. Like Freddie Mercury once very famously said "I want to break free".

If I remember correctly, it was at a simlar time last year, around the end of March, i think, that I decided I needed a break and went out for a holiday with a coupla friends. It resulted in that memorable trip/trek to Kodachadri, which I'll never forget my whole life. It's deja vu all over again. Old wine in a new bottle, like they say.

This time though, I have set my sight higher i.e I plan to do a trip to Himachal Pradesh. I happened to meet a long lost uncle of mine (well, not excactly long lost, just hadn't seen him for like, ever) who runs a resort up there in Himalaya Zone. He says the resort is at the foothills of the Himalayas, with the mountains on one side and a stream on the other. That was enough to get me all hyper about making the trip sometime soon. Let me assure you that this trip will not have arduous treks along mountain ranges, nor will it have excessively long walks along the terrains. All i'll do is eat, sleep, read a book and do some fishing (The trouts are biting now, it seems and they also taste very good supposedly). All this for a measly six and a half grand (travel to and from Delhi, stay and food included). If anyone is interested in accompanying me on this trip, please leave a comment, and we can make some plans.

Moving on, summer's back. And i'm sulking. Most of my bad hair days are in the summer (It ain't a joke, I shed more when it's hot), and given the pathetic state of affairs, it does't seem like it'll take much longer before I join the evergrowing line of Bald Kini menfolk. I have toyed with shaving my head off completely, to see if it'll work out for me in the long run, but somehow I've never had the guts to pull off something like that. But given my unpredictable nature (to do all things stupid), I just might be clean shaven on top of the cranium, next time you see me.

The Holy cow has mooed.

Pics from my Road Trip - Shravanabelagola and Halebidu

Many thanks to Keshava and Armin, my co-passengers on this trip.